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Jun 4, 2008 18:48:09 GMT -5
Post by sOuLcRuShEr on Jun 4, 2008 18:48:09 GMT -5
THREE THINGS TO PONDER:
1. Cows 2. The Constitution 3. The Ten Commandments
C O W S
Is it just me, or does anyone else find it amazing that during the mad cow epidemic our government could track a single cow, born in Canada almost three years ago, right to the stall where she slept in the state of Washington ? And, they tracked her calves to their stalls. But they are unable to locate 11 million illegal aliens wandering around our country. Maybe we should give each of them a cow.
T H E C O N S T I T U T I O N
They keep talking about drafting a Constitution for Iraq . Why don't we just give them ours? It was written by a lot of really smart guys, it has worked for over 200 years, and we're not using it anymore.
T H E 1 0 C O M M A N D M E N T S
The real reason that we can't have the Ten Commandments posted in a courthouse is this:
You cannot post "Thou Shalt Not Steal," "Thou Shalt Not Commit Adultery," and "Thou Shall Not Lie" in a building full of lawyers, judges and politicians...It creates a hostile work environment.
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Jun 4, 2008 20:24:43 GMT -5
Post by Dxoutlaw on Jun 4, 2008 20:24:43 GMT -5
Sponge Bob
Everyone has a personality of a cartoon character. Have you ever asked yourself what cartoon character do you most resemble? > > A group of investigators got together and analyzed the personalities of well known and modern cartoon characters. The information that was gathered was made into this test. > > Answer all the questions (only 10) with what describes you best, add up all your Points > (which are next to the answer that you choose) at the end and look for your results. > > Do not cheat by looking at the end of the e-mail before you are done </ B>. > > Then > forward this to all your friends (including the person who sent it to you) and change the subject of this message to what character is you. > > 1. Which one of the > following describes the perfect date? > a) Candlelight dinner (4 pts.) > b) Fun/Theme Park (2 pts.) > c) Painting in the park (5 pts) > d) Rock concert (1 pt.) > e) Going to the movies (3 pts.) > > 2. What is your favorite type of music? > a) Rock and Roll (2 pts.) > b) Alternative (1 pt.) > c) Soft Rock (4 pts.) > d) Country (5 pts ) > e) Pop (3 pts.) > > 3. What type of movies do you prefer? > a) Comedy (2 pts.) > b) Horror (1 pt.) > c) Musical (3 pts.) > d) Romance (4 pts.) > e) Documentary (5 pts.) > > 4. Which one of these occupations would you choose if you only could choose one of these? > a) Waiter (4 pts.) > b) Professional Sports Player (5 pts.) > c) Teacher (3 pts.) > d) Police (2 pts.) > e) Cashier (1 pt) > > 5 What do you do with your spare time? > a) Exercise (5 pts.) > b) Read (4 pts.) > c) Watch television (2 pts.) > d) Listen to music (1 pt.) > e) Sleep (3 pts.) > > 6. Which one of the following colors do you like best? > a) Yellow (1 pt.) > b) White (5 pts.) > c) Sky Blue (3 pts) > d) Dark Blue(2 pts.) > e) Red (4 pts.) > > 7. What do you prefer to eat? > a) Snow (3 pts.) > b) Pizza (2 pts.) > c) Sushi (1 pt.) > d) Pasta (4 pts.) > e) Salad (5 pts.) > > 8. What is your favorite holiday ? > a) Halloween(1 pt.) > b) Christmas(3 pts.) > c) New Year (2 pts.) > d) Valentine's Day(4 pts.) > e) Thanksgiving(5 pts.) > > 9. If you could go to one of these places which one would it be? > a) Paris (4 pts) > b) Spain (5 pts) > c) Las Vegas (1 pt) > d) Hawaii (4 pts) > e) Hollywood (3 pts) > > 10. With which of the following would you prefer to spend time? > a) Someone Smart (5 pts.) > b) Someone attractive (2 pts.) > c) Someone who likes to Party (1 pt.) > d) Someone who always has fun (3 pts.) > e) Someone very sentimental (4 pts.) > > Now add up your points and find out the answer you have been waiting for! Put your character in the subject line and forward to your frien ds and back to the person that sent this to you. > Very interesting to see who your friends are! > > (10-16 points) You are Garfield : > You are very comfortable, easy going, and you definitely know how to have fun but sometimes you take it to an extreme. You always know what you are doing and you are always in control of your life. Others may not see things as you do, but that doesn't mean that you always have to do what is right. Try to remember, your happy spirit may hurt y ou or others. > > (17-23 points) You are Snoopy : > You are fun; you are very cool and popular. You always know what's in and you're never out of style , you are good at knowing how to satisfy everyone else. You have probably disappeared for a few days more than once but you always come home with the family values that you learned. Being married and having children are important to you, but only after you have had your share of fun times. > > (24-28 points) You are Elmo: > You have lots of friends and you are also popular, always willing to give advice and help out a person in need. Y ou are very optimistic and you always see the bright side of things. Some good advice: try not to be too much of a dreamer. Dreaming too big could cause many conflicts in your life. > > (29-35 points) You are Sponge Bob Square Pants: > You are the classic person that everyone loves. You are the best friend that anyone could ever have and never wants to lose. You never cause harm to anyone and they would never not understand your feelings. Life is a journey, it' s funny and calm for the most part Stay away from traitors and jealous people and you will be stress free. > > (36 -43 points) You are Charlie Brown: > You are tender, you fall in love quickly but you are also very serious about all relationships. You are a family person. You call your Mom every Sunday. You have many friends and may occasionally forget a few Birthdays. Don't let your passion confuse you with reality. > > (44-50 points ) You are Dexter: > You are smart and definitely a thinker.... Every situation is fronted with a plan. You have a brilliant mind. You demonstrate very strong family principles. You maintain a stable routine but never ignore a bad situation when it comes. Try to do less over thinking every once in a while to spice things up a bit with > spontaneity!
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Jun 4, 2008 23:50:07 GMT -5
Post by colombiano on Jun 4, 2008 23:50:07 GMT -5
WOOT Im Sponge Bob by the way my score was 30
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Hein
Private
mmmhhhh
Posts: 5,760
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Funny
Jun 5, 2008 17:33:04 GMT -5
Post by Hein on Jun 5, 2008 17:33:04 GMT -5
<< Elmo
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Jun 6, 2008 12:14:59 GMT -5
Post by NightHawk on Jun 6, 2008 12:14:59 GMT -5
I'm snoopy, 23 points ;D
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Jun 6, 2008 13:31:23 GMT -5
Post by Dxoutlaw on Jun 6, 2008 13:31:23 GMT -5
35 here i am Sponge Bob Square Pants
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Jun 8, 2008 12:25:10 GMT -5
Post by BaLLiStIc on Jun 8, 2008 12:25:10 GMT -5
26 elmo LOL
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Jun 11, 2008 15:55:09 GMT -5
Post by sOuLcRuShEr on Jun 11, 2008 15:55:09 GMT -5
A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner. 'Good morning,' said the young man. 'If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners.' 'Go away!' said the old lady. 'I'm broke and haven't got any money!' and she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open.. 'Don't be too hasty!' he said. 'Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.' And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet. 'If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder.' The old lady stepped back and said, 'Well let me get you a fork, 'cause they cut off my electricity this morning.'
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Jun 12, 2008 21:04:36 GMT -5
Post by ganjaisgood2 on Jun 12, 2008 21:04:36 GMT -5
A little old lady answered a knock on the door one day, only to be confronted by a well-dressed young man carrying a vacuum cleaner. 'Good morning,' said the young man. 'If I could take a couple of minutes of your time, I would like to demonstrate the very latest in high-powered vacuum cleaners.' 'Go away!' said the old lady. 'I'm broke and haven't got any money!' and she proceeded to close the door. Quick as a flash, the young man wedged his foot in the door and pushed it wide open.. 'Don't be too hasty!' he said. 'Not until you have at least seen my demonstration.' And with that, he emptied a bucket of horse manure onto her hallway carpet. 'If this vacuum cleaner does not remove all traces of this horse manure from your carpet, Madam, I will personally eat the remainder.' The old lady stepped back and said, 'Well let me get you a fork, 'cause they cut off my electricity this morning.' Hahaha epic
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Jun 14, 2008 11:34:57 GMT -5
Post by Dxoutlaw on Jun 14, 2008 11:34:57 GMT -5
Windfall Tax on Retirement Income
Adding a tax to your retirement is simply another way of saying to the American people, you're so darn stupid that we're going to keep doing this until we drain every cent from you. That's what the Speaker of the House is saying. Read below...............
Nancy Pelosi wants a Windfall Tax on Retirement Income. In other words tax what you have made by investing toward your retirement. This woman is a nut case! You aren't going to believe this.
Madam speaker Nancy Pelosi wants to put a Windfall Tax on all stock> market profits (including Retirement fund, 401K and Mutual Funds! Alas, it is true - all to help the 12 Million Illegal Immigrants and other unemployed Minorities!
This woman is frightening. She quotes..." We need to work toward the goal of equalizing income, (didn't Marx say something like this), in our country and at the same time limiting the amount the rich can invest." ( I am not rich, are you)
When asked how these new tax dollars would be spent, she replied: "We need to raise the standard of living of our poor, unemployed and minorities. For example, we have an estimated 12 million illegal immigrants in our country who need our help along with millions of unemployed minorities. Stock market windfall profits taxes could go a long way to guarantee these people the standard of living they would like to have as 'Americans'." (Read that quote again and again and let it sink in. Lower your retirement, give it to others who have not worked as you have for it.
Send it on to your friends. I just did!! This lady is out of her mind!!!!
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Jun 14, 2008 11:48:51 GMT -5
Post by sOuLcRuShEr on Jun 14, 2008 11:48:51 GMT -5
shouldnt that be in rant and raves?? and fuk that bitch!!!
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Jun 14, 2008 13:29:27 GMT -5
Post by Dxoutlaw on Jun 14, 2008 13:29:27 GMT -5
shouldnt that be in rant and raves?? and fuk that bitch!!! maybe so soul i am sry about that
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Jun 18, 2008 11:55:54 GMT -5
Post by sOuLcRuShEr on Jun 18, 2008 11:55:54 GMT -5
PROFESSIONALLY SPEAKING....
Five surgeons from big cities are discussing who makes the Best patients to operate on.
The first surgeon, from New York ,says, 'I like accountants on my operating table because when you open them up, everything inside is numbered.'
The second, from Chicago ,responds, 'Yeah, but you should try electricians! Everything inside them is color coded.'
The third surgeon, from Dallas ,says, 'No, I really think librarians are the best, everything inside them is in alphabetical order'
The fourth surgeon, from L os Angeles chimes in: 'You know, I like construction workers... Those guys always understand when you have a few parts left over.'
But the fifth surgeon, from Washington , DC shut them all up when he observed: 'You're all wrong. Politicians are the easiest to operate on. There's no guts, no heart, no balls, no brains, no spine, plus the head and the ass are interchangeable.
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Jun 19, 2008 14:17:19 GMT -5
Post by MaLiGnAnT SpIrIt on Jun 19, 2008 14:17:19 GMT -5
Haha...that is funny as hell soul! Anyways, was just stopping by, I am in school and shit now, but anyways, thought that I would say hey what is going on?
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Hein
Private
mmmhhhh
Posts: 5,760
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Funny
Jun 19, 2008 16:52:03 GMT -5
Post by Hein on Jun 19, 2008 16:52:03 GMT -5
Sup Terrance, good to see you around, how are things going ?
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